GELATO THEORISTS: We are a maddening bunch, cream-puff-crazy over creating flavours that have only existed in the collective imaginations of the Nasalis Larvatus. We don’t do skinny, fat free desserts (get some I-feel-so-delusionally-healthy-eating-powder-made-frozen-desserts-served-with-oh-so-cute-toppings for those). We are indulgent and we make no apologies for it. We source our full cream milk and fresh cream from local dairies, we use real fruits, fresh herbs, weird and wacky ingredients we stumble across in our made to order gelato and sorbet. Come here for some pampering and real lurvin’ (it
might will get a little heated). Whether you’ve had a long day, a hard life, manfriend problems or your Gelato-Cup-Is-Always-Half-Empty, we are here for you like Mr. Chow is to Phil, Stu and Alan.
GELATO SCIENTISTS: Why Liquid Nitrogen? There is a truckload of science behind it. But first, you need to understand
Ice Cream Gelato, it is a cross breed of art and science creating a microstructure of ice crystals, air bubbles, fat droplets and a viscous solutions of sugars, polysaccharides and milk proteins. It involves physical chemistry, food science, colloid science, chemical engineering, microscopy, materials science and ultimately consumer science. The use of liquid nitrogen at N2 Extreme Gelato plays on the strength of a phenomenon called nucleation-dominated ice crystallisation, it forms a large number of microscopic ice crystals in seconds, resulting in exceptionally smooth textures. (Clarke, C 2012, The Science of Ice Cream 2nd Edition) This also means we are able to make gelato on order and serve it at that perfect temperature of -6C. Freshness guaranteed.
Is Liquid nitrogen safe? Yes. Nitrogen is non-toxic, non-flammable and it constitutes 78.09% of the earth’s atmosphere (yes a quote from wikipedia and we’re not ashamed of it). In fact you’ve probably had a few mouthfuls already while reading our waffle (mmm waffles……). Liquid nitrogen boils off when it comes in contact with anything warmer than itself (the boiling point of liquid nitrogen is -196C), we guarantee its completely evaporated by the time its in your cup. Your safety is our priority and we do have rigorous safety procedures and training in place to keep everyone safe. So please fasten your seatbelt, make sure your seat is in the upright position and your tray table is stowed away for takeoff into the stratospheric world of gelatorgastronomy.
GELATO CONNOISSEUR 101
GELATO NIGHTMARE: Staff with bulging biceps the size of Uluru (from crocodile-wrestling matches of course), psychedelically coloured gelato tubs (think Strawberry gelato with the pink hue of Dolores Umbridge’s ‘lips’, fluoro green Mint Choc Chip with hardened chocolate ribbons or Cookies n’ Cream that looks like soggy biscuits), a battle between the rigidity of the spoon and the solidity of the gelato. Gelato as icy as Paolin Hansun’s heart, and sticks to your tongue like you just licked a chairlift.
GELATO WET DREAM: It should emit a faint glow, like Mother Teresa’s halo. It should peer at you with huge teary eyes that plead ‘Yamate Kudasai’, invoking a beastly urge within you to overpower it. You should feel a mild resistance as you ‘break-in’ the gelato with your spoon and a slight elasticity as you pull out and deliver it into your oral cavity. Upon hitting your palate, you instinctively press your tongue against the roof of your oral cavity and roll it around (to maximise the surface area of the gelato coating your tongue so its warmed by your internal body heat, letting you perceive the flavour in its entirety). It should overwhelm you with an intense smoothness very much like your mum’s calves after a hot wax (we’re not so sure about her other parts). You achieve inner clarity as your eyes roll to the back of your head, and life will be as peaceful and tranquil as Cradle Mountain-Lake St Clair National Park, before the flavours hit you in a rush, like diving into the To Sua Ocean Trench just as the Beaver Dam breaks free. Flavours glide, tumble and do pirouettes on your tongue leaving scars on your soul as you know you will never be whole again without it. Gelatorgastronomy at its finest. YUM!
And no we’re not trying to anthropomorphise our gelato (just sayin’).
THE LAST SPOONFUL: Before you draw any conclusions, look around you, it is your company that counts (if you’re alone may we suggest How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie) we are all here for a good time! So tuck in and enjoy! Cheerio peoplez!